I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize