You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
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