Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize
