Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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