I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Deaf chicks here I come
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.