I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
The pool of urine in the trash can signifies both a regretful yet successful night.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
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