Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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