And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize