areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Randomize
