1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
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