so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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