I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
