some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
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