If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
