Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize