**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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