I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
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