I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
