she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
