Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
