Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
