God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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