this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
