Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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