Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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