so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Less talking, more tequila
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Randomize
