Pants 0. Shit 1.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
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