Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
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