i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
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