Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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