I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize
