The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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