but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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