I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
