Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
