First night home from college and I already forgot that walking around nearly naked with my laptop open to smut porn isn't acceptable. Sorry, mom.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I'm sobbing to NWA
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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