I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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