I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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