u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
