Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
