OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
