eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize