margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
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