I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
