another moral hangover. fuck.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Never joke about your clitoris.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize