I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize