And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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