it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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