I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
