yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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