who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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