The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
